"I will lift my eyes to the Maker of the mountains I can't climb. I will lift my eyes to the Calmer of the oceans raging wild. I will lift my eyes to the Healer of the hurt I hold inside. I will lift my eyes, lift my eyes to You." -Bebo Norman
How could I believe that I could do something without God in it? I mean, it was He that created this world and everything in it right? It was He that made me in my mother's womb? Wasn't it He that gave me the very talents that I possess, the very breath that I breathe, the very voice with, which I speak?
Then how could I have believed that I could do something without God in it? Now that I look back through the eyes of the Spirit, it was obviously my pride, my selfishness, and all of my other sinful characteristics that led me to believe that I could manage on my own. But all I have is the hurt, disappointment, guilt, and confusion that followed my being so impulsive as opposed to waiting on the Lord's approval. And as it turns out it seems that I would I have been waiting for His approval until my death because He was never going to give it. It was outside of His will. He had something else planned for me, but I thought I knew better at the time. I'm sure I would have been able to shut my flesh up had I been in the word, but I digress.
Right now as I sit here, I'm thinking of all of the ways that I can cope, but I have yet to come up with one. However, I know a way in, which I cannot cope, but receive COMPLETE restoration. I will lift my eyes. Hit my knees. Call out to my Lord, Jesus Christ. As I said before I'm confused, dissapointed, and beyond hurt. And as the song says He's the One that formed these mountains that have left me confused. He's the One that created this raging ocean that I find myself being thrown about in. And He's the only One that can see and understand the depths of my heart and heal the pain therein. So I will trust Him. I will put it in His hands. I will cast my cares on Him, because He cares for me (1 Peter 1:7) and the burden that He has for me is light (Matt 11:30).
In John, chapter 6, upon seeing that the Christian walk is not an easy one, many of Jesus' disciples deserted Him. Then Jesus looked to the Twelve and said "You do not want to leave too, do you?" And Peter answered Him saying, "Lord, to whom shall we go? You have the words of eternal life. We believe and know that you are the Holy One of God." (John 6:60-69)
This passage of scripture has ministered to my soul. It has reminded me countless times that in the midst of any situation, there is only one that I can turn to, and that is God Himself. I do not know how to fix my problems, I only know how to make them. The Lord knows my struggles and His desire is that I will lift my eyes to Him in the middle of the flames and seek His guidance. He wants to refine me through my circumstances and remove yet another of my many weaknesses. God works all things for the good of those who love him, and who have been called according to his purpose (Rom. 8:28). So even though I've made a horrible situation, He has the power not only to fix it, but to make one so beautiful that my heart cannot contain the joy that it brings.
